Monthly Archives: May 2014

Posted on

How To Handle Frustration In Prayer

by

In my last post, I talked about our 3 responsibilities in asking things of God. While I do believe these 3 responsibilities are very real and effective, I also know (from experience) that they do not constitute a formula for getting what we want from God. In fact, sometimes we meet frustration in prayer despite following these steps!

frustration in prayer

Frustration In Prayer?

See if these questions from my last post resonate with you. If you have prayed for anything for an extended period of time, you have likely asked these questions in some form or another.

So what is the deal? Why is it so different when we are asking of God? Why do we often get no answer (or one we don’t like!) even after praying for such a long time? Why does He seem to delay or withhold what is good from us?

Because He Loves Us!

The first answer to these questions? Because He loves us. The world puts on a show at times, but it does not love us! In fact, it hates us (John 15:18-19). So what the world will give us is often exactly what we want, but not what is good for us. God may not always give us what we want, but He WILL give us what is good for us.

This very point is made in the passage we looked at in my last post. Take another look…

9 What man among you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!
Matthew 7:9-11

His One Condition

Most of us miss the one condition that Jesus places in this passage about praying and receiving. He says that our Father will give us GOOD gifts. The condition for receiving is that the gift (what we are asking for) must be good for us. Let’s word the passage a different way to help make this point.

What if it read this way…What man among you, if his son asks him for a stone would give it to him? No, you would give him bread. Or if he asks for a snake, would you give that to him? No, you would give him fish!

Nothing Bad For Us!

Clearly, our Father is not going to give us something that is bad for us. He loves us too much for that. His purpose is to conform us to the likeness of His Son Jesus. Anything that would delay or reverse His progress in this purpose, He will withhold from us!

So, if this is true (and I am convinced based on Scripture that it is), then how should we move forward in prayer for those ideas, things, etc. that we have been praying for over a period of years? Do we quit asking despite the encouragement in this passage to “keep on asking”? How do we know what to do to eliminate this frustration in prayer?

Try These 3 Steps

I believe the following three steps can help. Again, please do not take these steps as a formula to get what you want. Take them as a guide to better ask for God’s will for you while learning exactly what that is. I hope you find these steps useful.

Step #1 – Keep Praying With Faith

As we read in my last post, there are plenty of references in Scripture that point us in this direction. We are NOT to give up praying just because we have not yet received an answer. We are NOT to give up praying simply because our request MIGHT not be good for us.

No, keep praying. Be persistent. Remain diligent and seek His face for whatever it is you want. This part is not unclear.

Step #2 – Acknowledge Possible Conflict

WHILE you are praying for whatever it is that has been on your heart, begin acknowledging to God that what you are praying for may not be good for you. Don’t stop praying for it, but let Him know you are willing to let go of it if He shows you it is His will for you to do so.

Maybe He will show you right then that your request is in conflict with His will for you. Maybe it takes time for this to happen. Maybe He will eventually grant your request when His timing is right. The Holy Spirit will guide you in this if you are attentive.

The point here is to keep asking until you receive the request or you learn it is not in His will for you. Either way, the prayer for that particular request should not end until one of these two results has occurred.

Step #3 – Listen More Closely

Finally, AS you continue to pray, also commit yourself to spending more time with God. You can do this through a combination of prayer, Bible study, fasting, and listening to His voice. The goal here is to draw closer to Him and to become more familiar with His heart and His voice.

As you do this (otherwise known as “delighting yourself in the Lord” Psalm 37:4), you will begin to see several things happen. One result will be that you will begin to know more about what God’s purposes are for your life. You will also begin to understand His heart more. His voice will become more familiar to you as well.

The result of this could be that you get clarity on whether your requests are in His will for you or not. You will also find that your desires begin to change. No longer will you want to have as much to do with what the world offers because you will find yourself drawn more to what God’s will offers, especially as this will comes more into focus.

No Downside!

Rather than stew in the frustration that comes with unanswered or apparently declined prayer (talking to myself here!), begin taking the above steps to dive deeper into the relationship with your Father. I promise, there is no downside to this!

How long have you experienced frustration in prayer?

Do you see how these steps can help?

Which is the toughest for you?

Posted on

3 Responsibilities In Asking Of God

by

In our culture today, if we want something, we just ask for it. And usually, we get it and we get it fast. We can literally pull into a drive-thru and have a hot meal, made to order, in less than 5 minutes. When we are asking of God, however, things are different…sometimes very different.

asking of God

Asking Of God For Years?

I have read about people (mostly mothers) that have prayed for years and years for family members or others to come to Christ. Others have been praying for what seems like forever to be able to have children. I have several prayers myself that have been going on over ten years!

So what is the deal? Why is it so different when we are asking of God? Why do we often get no answer (or one we don’t like!) even after praying for such a long time? Why does He seem to delay or withhold what is good from us?

Answers In Scripture

These are very good questions and ones that I think we can answer from Scripture. At the same time, I think it is important that we first answer another question. This other question needs to be answered first because it will help us better understand the answers to the first questions. Make sense?

Good! So let’s tackle the first question in today’s post and the other questions in the following post. The first question is this:

What is our responsibility in asking of God?

While this may seem like a simple question, I would like to turn to a part of the Sermon on the Mount for the foundation to the answer to this question. Let’s look at Matthew 7:7-11 and see what we find.

7 “Ask, and it will be given to you. Search, and you will find. Knock, and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives, and the one who searches finds, and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. 9 What man among you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!
Matthew 7:7-11

If you read this passage quickly, you could get quickly frustrated. It sounds like God is a vending machine. It sounds like asking of God is a quick way to get anything we want! Fortunately, this is not true. Fortunately for us, He loves us more than that, but we will get to that later!

God Does Not Work Like That!

If you have been a believer in Jesus long enough to pray for something, then you know this is not how it works. You know, likely from experience, that God is not a vending machine. Simply asking of God does not give us whatever we want the way it works in our culture.

However, there is good news! We have some responsibility in the asking and if we will follow what Scripture tells us to do, then we will get what we want (with just a little twist).

Step #1 – Go To God First

This sounds like a simple statement, but there is more to it than it seems. We cannot simply go to Him when we cannot get what we want elsewhere. We are to go to Him alone.

This means we should not be going to the world to get what we want. We should not expect our businesses, our employees, or our co-workers to give us what we want. Instead, we should be relying on God Himself to supply us with our needs.

To back this up, look at Matthew 6:33 where it says to seek Him first. Take a look at Psalm 37:4 where it says we are to delight ourselves in Him. In both verses, it follows that the rest will be given to us. The desires of our hearts will be provided by Him.

Step #2 – Go To God Continuously

The actual verb tense and mood from the original Greek in verse 7 above (ask, seek, knock) means that we are to continually do these things. We are not to ask, seek, or knock once. We are to do so repeatedly, over a period of time, with no sense of an end to these actions.

Look at the parable of the persistent widow from Luke 18:1-8. She continuously asks the local judge for justice against her adversary. She does not simply make a single request, but pesters him over time. He finally relents and grants her request, just to get rid of her!

Immediately after teaching this parable, Jesus says that God will certainly hear the cry of his children for justice and grant it swiftly! Like the widow, we need to make our requests known to God and do so with persistence. Better phrased, Matthew 7:7 might say, “the one who continues to ask as a habitual, ongoing requesting will receive.”

Step #3 – Believe It will Happen

Again looking at the original Greek tells us something interesting about the phrases, “it will be given” and “you will find” and “the door will be opened.” It tells us that these actions are believed by the author to be certain future events, not potential or possible results.

Jesus, the Son of the Living God, used language to say that He believed with certainty that these events (given, find, opened) would absolutely happen! That should be enough for us. For one more exclamation point, look at James 1:5-8.

5 Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives to all generously and without criticizing, and it will be given to him. 6 But let him ask in faith without doubting. For the doubter is like the surging sea, driven and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 An indecisive man is unstable in all his ways.
James 1:5-8

In my next post, we will look at a key condition Jesus puts in this passage about asking of God and getting what we ask for. We will also look at 3 ways to apply this Scripture to our business and personal lives.

Have you made a habit of asking of God first?

Do you ask continuously or once and done?

How strong is your faith when it comes to answered prayer?