Category Archives: Personal Growth

Posted on

Parenthood Or Christian Faith Exercise?

by

Each year, students all over the world are taught about the responsibilities of parenthood using a simple exercise with eggs. By having the students care for the “egg babies” over the period of a week, they come to realize important truths about being a parent. I think there are parallels between these truths and those relating to our Christian faith.

Christian faith

Egg Baby Assignment

The idea is simple, but brilliant. Each student is assigned an “egg baby” (an actual egg) for a whole week. They are told that they are to keep their egg baby with them at ALL times, wherever they go – regardless of their circumstances – for the entire week. Being caught without their egg baby at any point could equate to a failing grade!

They are not to leave the egg baby in a locker or in their car. They cannot forget it and leave it at home or at the soccer field. They must protect the babies from damage of any sort. No nicks, cracks, or gouges are allowed! They are graded on their ability to present a whole, undamaged “egg baby” at the end of the week!

Parenthood Principles

Even if you have never heard of this exercise, I think you understand the principles that are being taught. Parenthood, when viewed from the perspective of a young student, often looks easier than it really is.

Students cannot grasp the sheer responsibility of it and assume parents only have to “act” like parents at certain times during the day or week. Children likely think that parents play during the day and then become “parent-like” at home at night.

Children cannot possibly understand how becoming a parent changes your identity and forever changes your focus. No longer can you afford to only think about yourself and your own desires. Instead, being a parent means you always have the welfare of your children in mind.

You worry about their health, their friends, their whereabouts, etc. Being a parent is NOT a role you can turn on and off like a light switch. In fact, once it is “ON,” you can never turn it off! This is only something you can fully grasp when you become one.

So what is my point?

Similar Principles For Christian Faith!

My point is that this exercise is the perfect example of our Christian faith! Think about this and see if what I am saying makes sense.

If we would do as we are commanded in several passages of Scripture, then our Christian faith would be a light that would never turn off once turned on at salvation. Let’s first take a look at these passages:

Love the Lord your God with all of your heart, all of your soul, with all of your mind, and with all of your strength.
Mark 12:30

You are the light of the world. A city situated on a hill cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and puts it under a basket, but rather on a lampstand, and it gives light for all who are in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven.
Matthew 5:14-16

Then He said to them all, “If anyone wants to come with Me, he must deny himself, take up his cross daily, and follow Me.
Luke 9:23

But whoever denies Me before men, I will also deny him before My Father in heaven.
Matthew 10:33

Christian Faith Is Full Time!

Are you getting the idea here?

Just like the “egg babies,” our Christian faith should be with us at all times. It is not something that we can leave at home on Monday mornings or in the car when we go into the office.

We are not called to exhibit our Christian faith on Sundays and leave it at the church during the week. It should be a part of us at work on Monday and when we go out with friends on Friday night. If we are at the soccer field with the kids or at lunch with a client, our light should shine.

Like parenthood, when we accept Christ we become new people. The old is gone and that is true for every day of the week. We can no longer focus on ourselves and our own desires, but on the desires God has for us. This thinking is not part-time thinking, but should consume our every waking moment.

Extremely Difficult!

Sure, this does not sound easy. It doesn’t even sound natural. Good news – its not! Your “natural” self will not gravitate toward this way of living. It is a decision you will likely have to make and remake on a daily basis, just like Jesus said in Luke 9:23 above.

That’s okay! You are not a defective Christian if you have a hard time with this! The only problem is when you have a hard time with it and do nothing to change.

Start Now

I encourage you to begin changing your mindset. Focus on God’s word on a regular basis and ask Him to show you where you need to allow Him to have full authority in your life. Tell Him about your struggle (He knows) and how you want to improve (He will help!).

Keep the image of the “egg baby” in mind as you enter a new week. Remember this representation of your Christian faith and keep it with you at all times. It will not be so easy at first, but you will get better. Add accountability through like-minded believers and you will be well on your way!

Do you see the parallels with the exercise and our Christian faith?

Is this new to you or is it something you are already working on?

What is your biggest challenge?

Posted on

How To Read And Apply Scripture

by

We all know we need to read and seek to apply Scripture in our lives. This is no revelation. The problem is that sometimes we really don’t know HOW to do this, right? Sometimes, we read a passage and cannot understand what exactly it should be saying to us. While it sounds simple, sometimes it is not.

apply Scripture

My Effort To Apply Scripture

For today, I want to try something different from my norm. I am taking a short passage (Psalm 119:73-80) and I am attempting to put it into my own words. I have tried to imagine how each verse should apply to my life in particular and then worded it as a prayer back to God.

Keep in mind, this is clearly not Scripture itself. I am not attempting to rewrite it, only to apply Scripture to my life in my words and according to my understanding. These verses may say something else to you. The Holy Spirit is not limited in how He can speak to us!

Take a look at the following verses and see if they resonate with you. Each verse is listed in italics and then my words follow. I would love to hear your thoughts in the comment area at the end of the post.

Verse 73 – Your hands made me and formed me; give me understanding so that I can learn your commands.

    Father, Your hands made every part of me and formed each of my strengths, weaknesses, talents, gifts, and desires into the man that I am. There is nothing about me that You cannot use to impact others. I don’t just want to know Your commands or even to be familiar with them, but to fully understand them. Please give me this understanding so I can apply them in every role I play, in every part of my life.

Verse 74 – May those who fear You rejoice when they see me for I have put my hope in your word.

    I pray that all those who fear You and know You in a real way would be glad to see me and do business with me because they see You in our business. This is not for the sake of the business itself, but for the relationships between us and so that both of us are impacted in a way that draws us closer to You.

Verse 75 – I know, Lord, that your judgments are just and that you have afflicted me fairly.

    Lord, Your rules and judgments are perfect and true, even when they do not make it easy for me. I realize You have a much bigger perspective than I do and therefore I will not always understand Your ways. At least I know they are perfect as You are and that your application of them in my life is fair. I thank You for Your promises here.

Verse 76 – Let your steadfast love comfort me according to your promise to your servant.

    Father, I know my choice to be in business means I will face challenges and struggles on a regular basis. As a result, there will be times of loneliness and frustration. I accept that. I ask that You comfort me during these times with Your endless love. You have already promised this in Your word – I just claim it now!

Verse 77 – Let thy tender mercies come unto me, that I may live, for thy law is my delight.

    In addition to the times of frustration, there will also be times when I personally fall short of Your expectations and guidelines for my life. Though I do not intend to do so because I love Your laws, I know that I am flesh and will disappoint You. I pray now that Your mercy will come to me in those times. I pray not only that You will show me mercy, but that I will recognize it. I also pray I will show that same mercy to others.

Verse 78 – May the arrogant be put to shame for wronging me without cause; but I will meditate on your precepts.

    Often because of the business I am in, there are those who disparage me with lies. Though they do not know the truth, they arrogantly assume they do and speak as such. I pray that at some point You will shame them for these lies. To make sure I avoid this same behavior myself, I will continue to meditate on Your word. Help me with this!

Verse 79 – Let those who fear You, those who know Your decrees, turn to me.

    Lord, I interact with many people on a daily basis. While I know I am to be an ambassador to those who do not know You, I pray that you will surround me with others who do know You. I need the companionship, mentoring, and accountability from those who have walked with You and know You and Your ways.

Verse 80 – May my heart be blameless in your statutes, that I may not be put to shame.

    Father, I read Your word regularly and try my best to follow what it tells me. However, you know I am sinful and tend to wander from Your path. Please strengthen my faith to stick to Your path and give me a clean heart so that I am not ashamed of my behavior, thoughts, and deeds. I want to reflect You to those around me.

What does it look like when you apply Scripture to your life?

Have you done it like this before?

What methods would you recommend to apply Scripture to your life?

Posted on

How Often Do You Fill Your Spiritual Tank?

by

I am in the car business so I hear about a lot of different perspectives people have on the gas tank in their vehicles. The parallels between the gas tank in our car and our spiritual tank are helpful if we will stop and think about it

spiritual tank

Gas Tank Stories

I have heard of elderly ladies (my grandmother included) that have never pumped gas into their car because their husbands always did it. I hear about people who never let their tank get below half full and others that know to the tenth of a mile how long they can drive once the “Need Fuel” light comes on!

I even had one gentleman explain to me that he could not afford to keep his new truck because it cost him too much to fill it up. The truck got great fuel economy, but the tank was bigger than the one in his old truck. While he could go longer between fill-ups, he insisted that did not matter because each fill-up was more expensive. I could not convince him that he was spending the same amount of money overall!

Better When Full?

Whatever your thoughts about your gas tank, I imagine that you are like most people and feel more comfortable with a tank that is full or near so than you do with one that is near empty.

Maybe you want to be prepared in the event you need to leave in a hurry or go on a trip that requires more fuel. Maybe you commute to and from work and fear the idea of running out of gas on the highway in between. It could just be that you have more peace of mind when the tank is full.

Whatever the case, virtually no one likes to drive around all the time with the “Need Fuel” light on. No one enjoys testing the limits of their reserve tank on a daily basis. If they have a choice, most people will keep more gas in the tank rather than less – just for the peace of mind.

Spiritual Tank Is Similar

The same is true for our spiritual tank. Have you thought about this? Are you one who always runs around with a spiritual tank that is full or do you squeak by most days with just enough to survive?

If you are in the “always full” club, do you see the benefits? Do you realize that when you frequently bump into others with spiritual needs (whether they realize it or not) that you are able to share some of your fuel with them? Do you feel less wasted at the end of the day and wonder why?

Always Full?

If you are in this “always full” club, you have probably noticed the difference between you and others, but maybe you have not considered the cause of this difference. Maybe you have just chalked it up to a positive attitude or rosy lenses. I would bet this is not the case.

If I had to bet, those of you in the “always full” group have a fairly consistent quiet time. You probably have a pretty solid prayer life and I would also guess you attend small groups where you are poured into by others. Am I close?

Always Empty?

What about those of you that are at the other end of the spectrum. You have never stopped to pinpoint the reason, but you seldom get to the end of a day without feeling completely drained. You rarely have the energy to spend much time with those “needy” people you see around you at times.

You might look at others around you that are always chipper and they somewhat annoy you. You think their energy probably comes from a special blend of coffee or some hip energy drink that you can’t afford.

How To Keep Full?

Have you ever considered that maybe their spiritual tanks are kept at full and yours is not? Have you ever stopped someone like this to ask them what they do on a regular basis to “fill their tank”? Would you consider it?

Imagine going to the gas station every day and putting $1.50 worth of gas in your tank. How far would you get before needing more? How much sense would that make if you knew your travel for the day would require at least $5.00 in gas? Could you ever share gas with someone else if this was your habit?

Empty Brings Trouble

The idea here is that we cannot expect much peace in our lives if our spiritual tanks are always empty. Without a continuously filled spiritual tank, our days are doomed to stress, anxiety, and frustration. Just as bad would be our inability to share our peace with those around us.

Rather than trying to scrape by on the absolute minimum, we need to strive for a constantly full tank. We need to determine what it is that we need in order to maintain this full spiritual tank and we need to do that on a regular basis.

Fill With Scripture

For some, this is simply the act of reading the Bible every morning. Maybe it is Psalms or Proverbs. Maybe it is Paul’s letters. Regardless, simply reading from God’s Word can be an instant spiritual tank filler.

For others, this does not work. Maybe they do not understand what they are reading and need help or explanation. Maybe they just get their energy and fill from being in a group that is discussing Scripture. The different perspectives offered help them digest the learning more clearly.

Other Ways To Fill

There are many ways God can use to fill our spiritual tank. We only have to ask Him to help us find the methods that work best with our unique characteristics. I promise He is faithful to answer and help us stay at FULL!

Take some time today and think about which group you are in. If “always full,” then look for someone in the other group and share your methods with them. Teach them how to maintain a full tank.

If you are in the “always empty” group, in addition to prayer, look around and find someone from the other group. Ask them questions and be ready to apply what you learn. Don’t be content with your “Need Fuel” light staying on all the time!

How often do you fill your spiritual tank?

Do you recognize times when you have run on empty?

What is life like for you when your spiritual tank is full?

Posted on

Mind Like Water Is Possible!

by

Several years ago, I found an audio book on the clearance rack at the local Staples office supply store. That book was called Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity and it revolutionized how I approach my work day. While I cannot go into the details of the whole program author David Allen proposes, I can tell you that there is a spiritual lesson to be learned from him as well.

mind like water

Mind Like Water

Getting Things Done (GTD) is a work-life management system that begins with a concept called “mind like water.” This idea is best understood by picturing a quiet pond where the water is perfectly still…not a ripple anywhere. When a rock is tossed into the pond, ripples are created in the water. Throw another rock in and more ripples appear.

If you throw enough rocks into the pond, one after another, then your quiet, still pond is a memory. In its place is rough water, waves and ripples crossing each other as they run from one side of the pond to the other. Do you get the picture?

Now, go back to the original picture of the quiet, calm pond. Your mind is like this water. Without constant inputs, it can be quiet and still. In this state, you can be more creative, more effective, have a sharper focus, etc. When your mind is calm like this pond, getting things done is so much easier. You know exactly what I am talking about!

Life Throws Rocks

Unfortunately, life throws rocks. Every time you are told about something you have to remember, a rock is tossed into your “pond.” When you a meeting is added to your schedule or a report is requested of you, more rocks are tossed in. Pretty soon, sometimes before you are finished with your first cup of coffee, your pond looks like the Atlantic.

Getting Things Done is a system that teaches you how to minimize the ripples from each rock and to get back to “mind like water” quicker (and stay there). I can vouch for its effectiveness as I have been using it for years. It is not simple, but once you get the hang of it, you will never go back!

Spiritual Mind Like Water

Folks, the cool thing is that this idea of “mind like water” also describes our spiritual life. Just think about how easy it is to worship God or pray for extended periods of time WHEN your mind looks like the quiet, still pond. Things seem easier then, right?

Unfortunately, as I have already said, life throws rocks! Sometimes you cannot get out of bed before the anxiety sets in and takes away any peace you thought you had. Whether these rocks come from business issues, family problems, or health concerns (or a combination!), maintaining a spiritual “mind like water” is tough these days.

Even if we manage to escape without waves and ripples for a season, we know it is only a matter of time before the tumult returns. Why is life so hard like this? Why can’t we have more quiet time when our minds are at peace instead of churning through the day?

Its How We Learn

Well, I read a verse today that speaks to this. Here it is:

It was good for me to be afflicted
so that I could learn Your statutes.
Psalm 119:71

I think God knows we learn better when we go through tough times. He knows that we draw closer to him during the storms. Maybe getting things done is easier when there are fewer waves, but He is more interested in our relationship with Him than He is in our getting things done for Him.

So first, recognize that the waves bring us to Him and as a result, help us to learn and mature in our Christian walk. Don’t fight the waves. Instead, ask what you can learn from them.

Constant Tumult Not Necessary

At the same time, God does not necessarily desire for us to be in constant tumult in our minds. The external waves can teach us much, but even in the midst of the storms, God promises that we can have peace!

So even though you will face storms throughout your life, you can still have a peace inside. Your mind can still be like water – absent of anxiety and fear. I wrote several posts on this recently (read them here), but the bottom line is that you must take an eternal perspective on life.

Eternal Perspective

I believe this peace comes from recognizing that this life is temporary and is only a brief glimpse of the eternity we have ahead of us. When we trust God completely, to the point where all anxiety and fear is replaced with peace, then we can experience spiritual “mind like water.”

When we can do this – even for short periods of time – we are better able to hear and understand what God wants us to learn. When we are free from worry about the distractions in this world and focused on His peace, then the insights and wisdom we can gain will astound us.

I encourage you to try Getting Things Done if you need an effective work-life management system. However, more important than that is gaining the eternal perspective that can help you achieve a spiritual “mind like water.” I promise you will never go back!

Have you experienced “mind like water”?

Is your eternal perspective allowing you to have peace in the storms?

What do you need to do next?

Posted on

Anxiety: What Is The Worst That Can Happen?

by

Recently, I published a couple of posts on eliminating anxiety. While I wish I could believe that anyone who read those posts has now eliminated all traces of anxiety, I doubt that is the case. Therefore, I want to share more thoughts about defeating this debilitating attack of the enemy.

anxiety

Bible Is Truth!

If you read those last two posts, you will remember that Step #1 was to recognize and believe that the Bible is 100% truth. If this is not something you are willing to accept, then I will say again that you need to learn to enjoy anxiety. You are not going to defeat it otherwise.

Assuming you do accept the Bible as truth, then I want you to take a look at the following excerpt from Psalm 91. For the full effect, I suggest you read all of Psalm 91. Read it slowly and carefully and think about what you are reading.

Because you have made the Lord—my refuge,
the Most High—your dwelling place,
no harm will come to you;
no plague will come near your tent.
– Psalm 91:9-10

What Is The Problem?

Let’s first tackle the obvious problem with these verses (and the whole Psalm 91). Here, we are told no harm will come to us. Elsewhere in Psalm 91, we are told that others will fall at our right and left, but the attack will not reach us. We are told we will live a long life.

Clearly, when we take this literally, we have a hard time accepting what it says. We know of people who have fallen. We have been affected by attacks. We know those who have died way too young. So why do you think it says what it says? Are we missing something?

It Is All About Perspective!

I think it is all about perspective. If we look at this Psalm from an earthly perspective, then it is easy to argue that it is not true. Anxiety still makes sense because of all that can happen to us.

However, if we look at this passage from an eternal perspective, the picture changes dramatically. Imagine the Psalmist is not referring to our earthly body when he refers to our tent. Instead, consider that he is talking about our soul. Does that change things?

In fact, read the entire Psalm 91 again and experience it from your soul’s perspective. Maybe this is a little unconventional, but I think it is sound advice. When you read this Psalm from the eternal perspective, it makes perfect sense.

Eternal Perspective

Sure, things are going to happen in this life here on earth. Yeah, there will be challenges and pain, even death. None of this is avoidable and all of it can cause anxiety when viewed from a short-term perspective.

The problem is that the short-term perspective is usually our default view. It takes practice, perseverance, and prayer to develop our eternal perspective muscles. It won’t happen overnight in most cases. Nor will it continue automatically once you achieve it. Maintaining an eternal perspective is an ongoing battle, but it is worth the fight.

When you can maintain an eternal perspective and know that your eternity is in God’s capable and loving hands, then you can have peace during the short-term storms, trials, and defeats in this life. Nothing the enemy can throw at you can harm your tent (soul).

Anxiety Elimination Exercise

I will leave you with one quick exercise. I give you this from my own experience when dealing with anxiety years ago. It worked then and I have never forgotten it since. See if it makes sense to you.

I called my father with what I felt at the time was a significant, emergency customer issue – at least from my perspective at the time. I described it to him and expected him to gasp, wondering what in the world we would do! Fortunately for me, he remained relaxed.

He asked me a simple question, “What is the worst that can happen?”

I thought for a moment and responded with what I thought would be a reasonable, but terrible result.

He asked again, “What could happen that is worse than that?”

I paused again, thinking outside the box. I gave him an outlandish answer that included the customers pulling out guns and other weapons.

Again, he asked, “No, what is the WORST that can happen?”

Frustrated, I snapped back, “I don’t know! You tell me!”

Still calm, he answered, “The worst that can happen is that you die and go to hell. There is nothing worse. Is that a possibility for you?”

“No sir,” I responded quietly, “I have settled that forever.”

He then removed every ounce of anxiety from the situation. He said, “If that is not a possibility for you, then there is nothing more in this situation for you to worry about. The worst is taken care of – now go and address the situation as best you can.”

Ask Yourself The Same Question

I ask you the same question – is that a possibility for you or have you settled it?

If you are certain of your personal salvation based on what the Scripture says, then there is nothing else for you to worry about. Everything else pales in comparison to that. All that is left to do is for you to handle each situation as it comes. Do the best you can. The rest is taken care of.

Can you see Psalm 91 from an eternal perspective?

How does this impact your thoughts about anxiety?

Does the exercise help?

Posted on

5 Steps To Eliminate Anxiety, Part 2

by

[This is a the second half of my post on the 5 Steps To Eliminate Anxiety. If you have not read the first post, please take a moment to do that before reading this one. It will make much more sense!]

anxiety

Praying For Patience?

Have you ever prayed for patience? If you have or you know someone that has, you know that is just asking for trouble, right? With training for patience come trials. I have news for you…the same is true for writing about anxiety! Before my last post, I felt I had very little to “worry” about. In the last couple of days the reasons for anxiety have flooded in!

So far, I have attempted to practice my own advice! I am excited to say that it is working at the moment. I may have to come back to you later with some modifications or further instructions, but for now I will stick with my 5 Steps.

Eliminating Anxiety!

In my last post, I talked about the root of anxiety being a simple uncertainty of the future. I described how this uncertainty is not a problem until consequences are added. It is usually the size of the consequences that creates the anxiety that is so difficult for us to handle.

In that post, I gave the first two of these 5 Steps To Eliminate Anxiety. Following is a summary of the first two steps and then the details of the final three steps. I suggest you take these and pray through them. I truly believe you will find that, with practice, they are effective.

Step #1 – Bible Is Truth

We must recognize and believe that the Bible is absolutely and totally the Word of God AND that it is without error or fluff. This step is non-negotiable and is the foundation for Step #2.

Step #2 – Read About Your Future

The next step is to read about our ultimate future as described, and promised, in the Bible. We are told there that Jesus died for us. If we accept Jesus as Lord and Savior of our lives, we are promised an eternity with Him. Therefore, what happens to us between now and then is in His hands and unworthy of worry or anxiety.

Step #3 – Pray For Faith

Because it is easier to read and understand the truth in Step #2 than it is to fully accept it and internalize it, our next step is to pray for the faith we need. We need to be just like the father (whose son was dying) who said to Jesus, “I do believe! Help my unbelief!” (Mark 9:14-27)

Many professing Christians believe the Bible is true and that it gives us a picture of our ultimate future, but when life comes at them, their faith fails them. Anxiety takes over and faith seems like a distant memory. We simply cannot allow this to continue!

Cry out to God for the faith needed to believe what He tells you in His Word. Do not relent until He grants you this faith. Just remember that much of our faith comes from going through these trials and coming out on the other side. Looking back builds our faith for the next one!

Step #4 – Repeat Steps #2 & #3 As Needed

Unlike learning not to put your hand on a hot stove, this lesson about anxiety is not a once-and-done kind of lesson. This is something many people will struggle to defeat over a period of time. While this may be true, do NOT accept that it cannot be defeated. Anxiety is not something you just have to learn how to live with – unless you cannot get past Step #1!

Because it may take time, you need to keep doubling back to Step #2 and then Step #3. Repeat these steps over and over. Write them on labels and put them on your monitor at work and the dash of your car. Put them on your refrigerator at home. Memorize the Scriptures that speak to you the most.

As you do this, keep praying for God to help your unbelief. You may believe that He saved you, but you have trouble believing that He will provide a job for you. Maybe you can trust Him with your soul, but cannot seem to place your teenager in His hands. As you pray through this, you will begin to see the fallacy of your logic and your faith will grow to meet the challenges you are facing.

Step #5 – Enjoy The Peace

Oh yeah, Step #5 is the goal! If you will follow the first four steps listed above, then you will be treated to what is probably the greatest gift God has given us after our salvation – peace. If you have had it, you know what I mean!

If you look at the beginning of all of Paul’s letters in the New Testament, he starts with a mention of peace. Jesus talks many times about the peace he brings us, despite the trouble of this world. This is clearly our goal as it is the total absence of anxiety. Not only is it promised to us, but it is within our reach every day!

Practice Makes Perfect

You will not be fully successful with these five steps on your first try. You absolutely must commit to practicing them if you expect to be good at them. If you want this to work, you must work through these steps over time. Each time you will get stronger and stronger. Eventually, you will see that the truth of Steps #1 & #2 are enough to vanquish the anxiety at your door. Until then, keep practicing!

Now that you have the 5 steps, what do you think?

Are you willing to try following these steps?

What part of this process is new to you?

Posted on

5 Steps To Eliminate Anxiety

by

Before I even start this post, I want to be clear (again) that I do not have it all figured out AND that I may be oversimplifying an issue that seriously plagues most of us at one time or another. At the risk of offending some and confusing others, I am going to offer what I believe is the cure to this problem. This problem is anxiety.

anxiety

Anxiety Is Destructive

It goes by many names – stress, worry, concern, apprehension, fear, etc. Even when we only focus on the business world, anxiety takes on many shapes, sizes, and forms. Some suffer from it like a minor rash, but for others it may as well be a broken back or worse!

It can paralyze you when you need to make a critical decision. It can steal the focus you so desperately need to keep your business on track. It can be a pothole or a cliff. If you don’t suffer from it yourself, you surely know someone who does. If you or that person happens to be in leadership or a position of influence, then the results can be anywhere from frustrating to devastating.

Anxiety Defined

So what exactly is anxiety? What is at its root?

I think the root of anxiety is simply an uncertainty of the future.

At this level – simple uncertainty – there is not really a problem. Uncertainty by itself is not a big deal. Without consequences, uncertainty scares no one. I can be uncertain about the outcome of a coin toss without experiencing anxiety.

Add Consequences

However, if that coin toss takes on more significant meaning or determines what my future may look like, then anxiety can creep in. If the potential consequences of the coin toss are dire enough, anxiety can come rushing in like a flood!

The greater we perceive the consequences of the coin toss (or any event or situation in our lives), the more intense the anxiety becomes. If there are little to no potentially adverse consequences to the coin toss, then we have little to no anxiety. The reverse is also true.

When we simplify it like this (and de-personalize it), it becomes easier to see how it works (and how we can eliminate it). Do you agree?

Eliminating Uncertainty

Clearly, there are two ways we can eliminate uncertainty (and therefore anxiety). First, we could know all the details of the future, right? If we absolutely know the future, uncertainty is gone. If you have already watched a key football game, there is no anxiety in watching a recording of it again later.

Unfortunately, we do not have the ability to look into the future to see the outcome of every situation that causes us anxiety. We cannot look ahead to see if sales will reach the required quotas we have been given. We cannot look into the future to find out if a new product will succeed or fail.

The second way to eliminate uncertainty (and the resulting anxiety) is to know the ultimate future of a situation so that you can then assume the details leading up to that ultimate future. Back to the example of a football game – even if you did not watch the game, but you know the final score, you know enough about what happened during the game to relax.

Folks, I honestly believe it really is that simple for life. We can live a life without anxiety if we can only eliminate the uncertainty inherent in it. It sounds simple, right? Well it actually can be that simple.

Step #1 – Bible Is Truth

First, we must recognize that the Bible is absolutely and totally the Word of God. We must believe that it is without error or fluff. We must completely trust what God says to us through His Word (2 Timothy 3:16). It is not enough for us to give lip service to this belief – it must be part of the core of who we are.

I wish I could tell you otherwise, but this first step is non-negotiable. There is no way in the world to completely eliminate anxiety without starting here. If you cannot get past this first step, then you need to embrace anxiety as a close friend! You are not getting rid of it!

You might think you are okay with this step at this point. I hope so. However, if you find trouble later in this process, you may want to come back here and dig a little deeper. Without a rock-solid foundation here, no further steps will help you.

Step #2 – Read About Your Future

Next, we need to read what the Bible says about our ultimate future. What I believe it says is that Jesus died for me. Because I accepted this and invited Him to take over as Savior and Lord, He saved me from my sin and promised me an eternity after this life with Him (John 3:16).

This is a done deal and nothing can change it. The enemy cannot steal me from my Father’s hands. In fact nothing can separate me from Him (Romans 8:35-39)! I believe this. I believe this with all that I can muster.

If that is true, then what happens in between now and that ultimate future in heaven is irrelevant. When I look at my life from 10,000 feet and know that my ultimate future is completely and totally secure with His promise, then there is nothing in the details at 100, 50, or even 10 feet that should worry me or cause me anxiety (Matthew 6:25-34)! This called having an eternal perspective and I think it is the key to solving the problem of anxiety.

Whenever something does begin to cause me anxiety, then I simply need to remind myself that my ultimate future is in His hands and the rest is immaterial. If this is particularly hard for me to do in a given situation, then I need to dig to find out what about this situation is more important to me than my ultimate future. I may need to ask why I trust God with my ultimate future, but not with this immediate situation.

Final Three Steps

Once I can take God at His Word and look at this life from the eternal perspective, then anxiety will fade. Unfortunately, this is not always as easy as it sounds. In my next post, I will give you the final three steps to eliminating anxiety. Once you can successfully complete all five steps, I believe you will have put anxiety in its place for good!

Do you have a problem with anxiety?

Do you see how Steps #1 & #2 can begin to help?

What would you suggest for Steps #3, #4, & #5?

Posted on

Failure, A Mark Of Success

by

Are you awash in a morass of failure? Does everything you try seem to turn to dust? Does every new venture end up a money pit? Does every new relationship end as a heart breaker? Does every new opportunity evaporate into thin air?

failure

Not Alone!

You fail a lot? Welcome to the club. You are not alone. In fact, you are some very good company. Almost without exception, those that have achieved the most, and are considered to be very successful, have also failed miserably. Consider these historical examples:

Failure Examples?

  • Jesus Christ seemed to be an utter failure when He died at about 33 years of age.
  • The Wright brothers crashed numerous flight tests before they got one to fly only about 30 feet.
  • Winston Churchill failed the sixth grade and was defeated in every public office role he ran for.
  • Thomas Edison’s teachers told him he was “too stupid to learn anything.”
  • Harland David Sanders, the famous KFC “Colonel,” couldn’t sell his chicken and more than 1,000 restaurants rejected him.
  • Steven Spielberg was rejected from his dream school, the University of Southern California, three times.
  • Walt Disney was fired by a newspaper editor because he “lacked imagination and had no good ideas.”
  • Albert Einstein didn’t speak until age four and didn’t read until age seven. His teachers labeled him “slow” and “mentally handicapped.”
  • Vincent Van Gogh only sold one painting in his entire life, to a friend.
  • J.K. Rowling was unemployed, divorced and raising a daughter on social security while writing the first Harry Potter novel.
  • Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart was dismissed from a position as a court musician in Salzburg and died with little to his name.
  • Ludwig van Beethoven was incredibly awkward on the violin, and his teachers felt he was hopeless at composition and would never succeed with the violin or in composing.

Where is God?

You may ask, “Where is God in all my failure?” My answer; He’s right there with you. Here are several lessons to take to heart from these examples of failure:

If you’ve never failed, maybe you haven’t really taken any real risks either. Maybe you haven’t tackled any really challenging scenarios. If you try for “safe” at all times, there won’t be much chance of failure; there won’t be much chance of outstanding success either.

Take Heart!

If you are in the midst of failure, take heart. Your best achievement yet may be your next attempt. If you’ve failed repeatedly, you are probably continuing to take calculated risks (be sure they are calculated and not emotional or foolhardy) and can probably point to numerous successes also. Success and failure work hand-in-hand.

Statistics indicate professional salespeople will fail to make a sale better than 80% of the time, but they view these failures as steps toward success.

Use Failure To Grow

If your failures point out personal inadequacies or weaknesses, examine them to see how you could strengthen these areas so you don’t make the same mistake again. Use failure as an opportunity for growth and personal development.

If your failures cause loss of self-esteem, embarrassment and humiliation, you need to ask yourself, “Does my sense of worth come from who I am or from what I do?” Initial feelings of this nature are normal, but if you tie worth to work, remind yourself of how Christ sees you, how He died for you, and how He is invested in your growth.

Begin to look at failure from a different perspective. One that responds to friends’ inquiries of, “How’s it going?” when you have just encountered another resounding failure with, “It’s going great. I’ve just eliminated another possibility en route to a successful outcome.”

Instruction From Scripture

  • Proverbs 24:16 “for though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again…”
  • Psalm 35:15 “But when I stumbled, they gathered in glee; assailants gathered against me without my knowledge.”
  • Isaiah 40:30 “Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;”
  • Daniel 11:35 “Some of the wise will stumble, so that they may be refined, purified and made spotless”
  • James 3:2 “We all stumble in many ways.”
  • Psalms 40:2-3 “I waited patiently for the Lord,…He lifted me out of the slimy pit…”
  • Jeremiah 8:4-5 “Say to them, ‘This is what the LORD says: “‘When people fall down, do they not get up?
  • Job 4:4 “Your words have supported those who stumbled; you have strengthened faltering knees.”
  • Psalms 145:14 “The LORD upholds all who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down.”

Just a few of the noteworthy biblical heroes that were examples of failure include:

    David’s failure with Bathsheba.
    Joseph’s failure and his brothers resulting actions.
    Moses’s failure when he killed the Egyptian.
    Peter’s failure when he denied Christ.

Failure Is Good!

Bottom line, failure is good for you. Failure provides many benefits. Failure keeps you humble. Failure enables others to identify with you. Failure prepares you to minister to others. Failure shows you are taking risks. Failure helps you understand anything of value is really accomplished through the Lord and is the result of His blessing.

So, keep on failing, knowing you are eliminating possibilities en route to success. Here’s a toast to failure! May God bring you much failure, and through it bless all those around you.

About the Author:
BILL HIGGINS is currently the Managing Director of MindWare Incorporated, an independent training and career coaching consulting firm. He previously served on the pastoral staff of churches in the U.S. and Canada, and worked in a managerial capacity for industry leading organizations.

Bill is a graduate of Biola University and Talbot Theological Seminary and his book; Your Road to Damascus: 6 Biblical Secrets for an Effective Job Search is now available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and MindWare Publishing websites.

Posted on

What Useful Tools Do You Have?

by

Have you ever owned a Swiss Army knife? You most likely know what I am talking about – the pocket knife with anywhere from 10 to 100 additional little tools, all built into one pocket-carry device. Growing up, it was the coolest of tools for a little boy to own! Even now as an adult, I can see them as useful.

tools

Various Tools!

Not only did they have a couple of different-sized blades, they also included both flat-head and Philips-head screwdrivers, tweezers, a corkscrew, and a bottle-opener. Some had miniature pliers and a file. You could even find them with a toothpick hidden inside.

The point of the Swiss Army knife was to have whatever tools you might need for a variety of situations. You might not see a need for all of the tools they had available, but they were there in case you needed them. I remember sometimes being amazed how much I used them when I wasn’t expecting to need them!

You Are The Same!

You want to know something really cool? You are the same way in God’s hands! No kidding! You have a variety of talents, skills, and experiences that when submitted to God, can be used by Him just like the tools of a Swiss Army knife in the hands of a Boy Scout (Ephesians 4:11).

Think about it. Every experience in your life that seemed exciting, victorious, devastating or miserable at the time can now be used to comfort someone else in the same situation. You know this is true.

Useful Strengths…

Every success you have experienced can now be used to encourage someone else that is struggling to break through. The tough path you followed to get to the peak can now serve as guidance for the one you are mentoring.

Each talent God gave you at birth or since can be used to connect with others and point people to Him. Maybe it is your voice (singing), your strength (relationships at the gym), financial insights (business relationships), or even your ability to do magic tricks (fill in the blank!) – each can be used by God for His purposes!

…And Weaknesses!

Even your particular weaknesses can be used by God. When you seek guidance from someone else because of their strength, you are creating a connection that God can use. When you publicly acknowledge to your employees that you don’t have all of the answers, you point them to the One that does!

See, God is working on us every day – even when we don’t realize it. He is adding tools here and there. These are tools that He can use just when you are not expecting it. He can use these tools to reach others and to draw them to Him.

There are even times when He uses these tools to get your attention! Think about those times when you felt like you were at the end of your rope, unable to go any further. Just when you thought your weakness would be the end of you, He shows up and uses that weakness to show you His strength!

My Advice!

My advice? Go buy a Swiss Army knife and start carrying it with you. Maybe you should put it on your desk at work, the dashboard of your car, or on your bedside table. You might just want to carry it in your pocket. Put it wherever you need a reminder that your God is amazing.

Let this simple, but multi-functional tool be a reminder to you that God is still working on you. Let it remind you that He is still adding to your toolbox in ways that He plans to use later. Allow it to serve as a reminder to thank Him for allowing you to be used in such an eternal way!

Which of your tools have you seen God use?

What tools do you think He is developing in you now?

Which of your tools should you seek to put to use?

Posted on

Are You Waiting To Be Told What To Do?

by

Our business is not a big one in the grand scheme of things, but we do get a good cross-section of employees with roughly 100 people working here. As a result, I have seen those that learn the job quickly and others that do not. Some understand their job and do what is necessary without being asked while others are waiting to be told what to do.

waiting to be told

Waiting To Be Told

If you have been working for any length of time, you have probably witnessed this. For the most part, any new employee needs to be told what to do in the beginning, right? Unless they have worked that exact job before, there are things they need to be told first.

They probably need to know WHAT to do, WHY, WHEN, and HOW they are to do it, and maybe a few other tips. Once they get this, they should be able to go forward on their own with only occasional guidance along the way.

Still Waiting…

The problem is that some employees are still waiting to be told what to do. You probably know some of these people where you work. Maybe they work for you. No matter how many times they have read the job description or listened to the training, they refuse to take action on their own. They can sometimes be found actually standing around because no one stopped to tell them what to do next! It really amazes (and frustrates) me!

To be clear, I am not talking about waiting to be told about NEW tasks, responsibilities, or ideas. As employees are being developed for promotion or more responsibility, they need to be taught more. They cannot know the new stuff until it is taught to them. I am only now talking about what they already know (or should know) they are to be doing.

What About Us?

So now that I have you worked up and as frustrated as I am, let’s (again) turn this around to be about us. You probably knew this was coming, didn’t you? For the sake of this discussion, we are the “employees” in this picture and God is the “employer”.

As you go through the rest of this post, ask yourself if you are acting just like one of these employees. Ask yourself if you are “standing around” waiting to be told by God (again) what He wants you to do. Be honest with yourself and allow Him to guide you. He will show you what He wants you to see.

Examples

Let’s take an easy example to start with.

Our “handbook” (the Bible) says that we are to love God (Matthew 22:37-40), right? This is called the Greatest Commandment and we should all be aware of it by now. We have probably read it many times and have likely heard sermons (training) on it as well.

So, are you DOING it? Are you really LOVING God? Are you doing it with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength? OR are you waiting to be told again that you are to do this?

If I am honest in answering these questions for myself, then I would say I am doing it sometimes and I am trying to do it other times. I can’t really say that at any point in time I am sitting around waiting to be told again to love God. I think I have a passing grade here, but not by much.

Another Example!

Let’s get a little tougher. We have all likely heard of the Great Commission (Matthew 28:19-20) as well, right? We are told here to go and make disciples of all nations. Again, we have read it and heard many sermons on it. I doubt there are any of us that can honestly claim ignorance here.

So, again I ask the question. Are you DOING it? Are you truly making disciples? Are you mentoring someone in the Christian walk? Are you engaging your employees, co-workers, and others in Christian ministry? Are you teaching what you have been taught?

In the past, I could answer this question with an easy “Yes!” without blinking an eye. Lately, I have allowed distractions to creep in and now I am unable to answer with confidence. What about you? Have you made an effort? Have you allowed distractions to interfere?

More Examples!

I won’t go into detail with each of the following areas from our “handbook,” but I will at least list them and let you ask yourself the questions. Think about each category and ask yourself the tough questions. Where are you waiting to be told what to do? If that is difficult for you or if you think you will go too easy on yourself, ask someone else to help you. Maybe that can be the start of a discipling relationship!

Evangelism (Acts 1:8)

Tithing (Matthew 23:23)

Love your enemies (Matthew 5:43-44)

Forgive your enemies (Luke 17:4)

Praying for others (1 Timothy 2:1-4)

Bible study (2 Timothy 2:15)

Take Action!

When you have had enough abuse for one day and you are ready to close out this post, stop and do one more thing. Decide on one, only one, of these areas and commit to do something!

Commit to make at least one change. Start doing something that you already know you should be doing. It will be the first step down a great and rewarding path!

Where are you doing what you know you should be doing?

Where are you waiting to be told what to do?

What are you going to do about it?